Free
by ForeverDreamer12
Summary: It was supposed to be the best Valentine's Day ever. But she wishes she were somewhere else, anywhere else. If only she could be at home, sitting by herself... (Oneshot. My entry for EsteVamp4998's writing challenge #3. Possible spoilers for anything in the anime. Rated T for mild language)


**My entry for EsteVamp4998's writing challenge #3. Spoilers for the anime. But p****lease no spoilers for the manga in the reviews, because I've heard things about it that may relate to some of the things said in this oneshot.**

**I recommend looking up a sad Fairy Tail music mix on Youtube to listen to while reading. It really sets the mood.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

_~Free~_

_-A Fairy Tail Oneshot-_

* * *

It was supposed to be the best Valentine's Day ever.

The party was in full swing, fireworks blasting up above, and music echoing from inside. The yacht floats in the beautiful sea, not moving. Stars dot the night sky, like someone spilled a bottle of golden glitter on black paper. It seemed like the perfect mood for some romantic dancing and stargazing with your loved one.

But she wishes she were somewhere else, anywhere else. If only she could be at home, sitting by herself. There was an uncomfortable weight on her chest, weighing her heart down. She clutches onto the railing of the boat with her gloved hands, staring into the dark, motionless waters.

Already her friends had tried to console her. Loke had thrown open the doors of the guild hall that morning carrying chocolates and shouting out, "Will you be my Valentine?!" only for him to be rejected instantly. Erza had tried talking to her, but she pushed her away. Happy offered her a fish, Mira offered advice, and Gray asked if she was feeling sick. All day people had been asking her what was wrong, questioning whether it was the holiday that was bothering her.

It wasn't. Of course it wasn't. Valentine's Day was nothing to be upset about, unless you were a depressed single or had been rejected. No, today just so happened to be a holiday. If only it wasn't...

_'But why?'_ she questions herself. _'Why did I have to start missing him today?'_ She grips the railing tighter. _'It's not like anything happened today involving him...'_

"Lucy?" She ignores the speaker, knowing exactly who it is. "Lucy, come inside! Please? Everyone's wondering where you are..."

"They can keep wondering," Lucy replies, her voice hollow. "I don't want to be in there right now..."

"Why?" he walks up beside her, looking at her face. "Why, Lucy?"

"No reason," she lies, refusing to look him in the eyes. He stays silent, as if thinking of a response. _Good._ Lucy liked silence. She wasn't in the mood for someone endlessly blabbing at her.

Finally, he speaks, breaking the silence Lucy longed for. "There is a reason...I can see the hurt in your eyes... Please, don't push me away like you've done with everyone else... It's _me_... I...I'm your best friend, right?"

Again she refuses to look at him, instead gazing down at the white silk gloves that covered her hands. She didn't answer, not wanting him to find another reason to continue talking. It was pointless to discuss the matter. Nothing was going to change because she talked about it.

Unable to stand the silence, he grabs her hands in his. "Talk to me! What's going on?!"

"NOTHING!" she screams, tearing her hands from his grasp. "Leave me alone! Can't you tell I'm upset, or are you as stupid as everyone thinks you are?!"

Hurt, he backs away. "I...I'm sorry..." He looks down at his feet. "I did something, didn't I? What did I say? I...I never wanted to hurt you..."

"It has nothing to do with you..." Lucy replies, her voice shaking. "I...I just...just go away!"

"No..." he whispers. "I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong..."

"Stop," she says, her voice thick with an indescribable emotion. "Please...give me some space..." She turns away from him, shaking. "Give me a chance to grieve!"

"Grieve?" he frowns. Realization then dawns on his face as it hits him... Grief...sadness...despair... He walks back towards her, ignoring her protests, and pulls her into his arms. "Oh, Luce...I'm so sorry...I understand completely..."

Lucy couldn't stand to be strong anymore. She'd been stupid, she realized. He had lost his father too...a long time ago... She buries her face into his chest, staining his gray suit with her watery dark tears. Her tears washed away the perfect mask of strength she hid behind, revealing the broken girl she truly was.

It had been a seven months now since she heard the news...the news of her father's untimely death...and it ate away at her, breaking her into pieces. She pretended to not care, to still hate him, but things came back to her, memories of his good days, and she couldn't lie anymore. For some reason, the love in the air during this holiday reminded her of the way he used to love her...the way she used to love him.

"I-I'm sorry..." she sobs uncontrollably, shaking. "I'm so, so sorry for m-making you deal with me when I get l-like this..."

"Shhh..." Natsu whispers, stroking her golden hair. "It's okay, Lucy..."

"Really?" She looks up at him, tears glittering in her eyes.

"Really..." He smiles sadly at her, gazing into her eyes. "It's always okay, to cry, especially if you're sad." He looks out into the distance, sadness crossing his face. "I have trouble remembering that sometimes... I always think I'm so tough and strong, that if I cried, you'd be scared..."

"No..." she tells him. "I w-wouldn't be scared...I'd...I'd just worry for you like I always do..." Their eyes meet again, tear-filled brown to deep black. "I really d-do worry about you sometimes...you've lost a lot t-too...yet...you don't show it... At least, not the way I do..."

"Like I've said before, whether or not you cry doesn't mean you care any less..." He pushes a strand of hair out of her face and tucks it behind her ear. "Everyone shows pain in different ways... Some cry...some rage...some isolate themselves from the world..." Nastsu sighs, looking down at his scarf. "Me...? I just pretend it's not even there..." He laughs shakily. "It's a shitty way to deal with your problems, Lucy...bottling them up and hiding them from the world... It doesn't solve anything. There's never any closure..."

He tilts his head downwards, his forehead lightly touching hers. "It sucks, Lucy..." he breathes, his voice heavy. "It sucks losing those you care about... And it sucks feeling the aftershocks the rest of your damn life... But there's nothing we can do about it...no way to escape the pain that torments us every day... We just have to live with it..."

"You'll see Igneel again," Lucy whispers. "I know you will..." She closes her eyes, another tear escaping as her eyelid falls over her eye. "But I...I'll never see my dad again...and...I never got to say goodbye..."

"Lucy..." Lucy sobs harder, burying her face into his chest again.

"I don't want anyone else to die!" she cries. "It's not fair! He's gone! My father, and my mother too! And so many others are gone now too! People died in the Eclipse fight, Natsu! And people die all over the world, every day, plunging people's lives into sorrow!"

Natsu smiles sadly, tears in his eyes. "But at the same time, Lucy...people are being born all over the world...those special kids who are born on Valentine's Day... People are falling in love, expressing their love... Singles are hanging out with friends, not caring about the world... People are putting their pain away for the day, forgetting about the tears, hiding their scars...this is a day of happiness..." Lucy looks up at him, overwhelmed by his positive outlook. "But even when today passes, and people go back to living the way they used to...there still is happiness..." He cups her face in his hands, gazing into her eyes.

"People are still living, Luce...living, breathing, and laughing... Life isn't about the past, it's about the present and the future. Yes, the past effects who we are today, but it doesn't define us... We still have a chance to become someone else if we choose the right path... If we choose to walk in the light, and believe in ourselves, the pain will slip away... It will never truly vanish, but you'll find yourself forgetting that you ever cried..."

"Natsu..."

"Shhh..." He wipes her tears away, smiling. "You're going to be okay..."

"Thank you..." Lucy whispers. "Thank you for everything you've ever done...Natsu I-"

"Don't say another word," he tells her softly. "I know..." With tears on his cheeks, he presses his lips against hers. Eyes closing, Lucy melts into the kiss, forgetting about the pain, pushing it away like Natsu told her to do. Hiding it wasn't the right thing to do, but letting it rule your world wasn't right either. She had to find her own happiness, her own path... She had to walk in the light.

Breaking apart from him, she slowly returned the smile still etched on his face. His smile widens into a grin, showing his pure white teeth. Lucy couldn't thank him enough... The weight was gone from her chest, removed by his gentle touch. The caress of his lips had destroyed the pain, and his words had turned on the light in this prison of shadow. She melts into his chest once more, and he wraps his arms around her, holding her close. She breathes in his warm, comforting scent as she closes her eyes.

"Better?" he whispers in her ear, still gently holding her.

"I feel..." Lucy pauses trying to find the right word. "...free..."

_Free..._ The word had so much weight, yet so little. She was a bird escaping from its iron-bared cage...she was flying now, up high in the sky, dancing with the golden stars... The pain was still there, she knew, dark and deep with despair, but she was denying it access to her heart. She had taken hold of Natsu's light, the warm glow of his fire, and scared the monsters away...

She pulls herself away from Natsu, turning around to the railing again. Her eyes drifted up to the sky, where the stars twinkled and glowed. But one star shone brighter than the rest, casting its brilliant golden light on Lucy. She smiles, placing her right hand over her heart. In that moment, she had no doubt that her father was watching her with a smile on his face, very proud of his little girl.

* * *

**I hope you enjoyed. I felt like the ending was weak, but oh well...XD Reviews are welcomed. I've been trying really hard to improve on writing sad stuff, so some constructive criticism would be highly appreciated.**

* * *

**~ForeverDreamer12, signing off.**


End file.
